Forgiveness. It is often easier said than done. We find it natural to hold on to a grudge. We may even find it weirdly satisfying. It is said unforgiveness is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies. Deep down, we may know that clinging to anger only hurt ourselves in the long run. However, we cannot bring ourselves to forgive.
How do we bridge the gap between knowing what we should do and actually doing it?
We read about the complex story of David and Absalom in 2 Sam 18 today. It is a story filled with betrayal, rebellion, and tragedy. Absalom attempted a coup and tried to steal the throne from his own father. Despite having his very life being threatened, David chose to forgive his son. When his men rallied against Absalom’s army, what did he do? He instructs them not to hurt him. (see verse 5.) However, his wish was not granted. Absalom was killed by David’s men who were too eager to exact revenge.
I just want to focus on David’s forgiveness today. It was not easy for David to forgive Absalom. He has every reason not to do so. And everyone would understand and support his decision.
Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. It is not condoning the wrong done to us. It is not to tolerate. Forgiveness is motivated by love. As Christians, is it a must for us to forgive?
The Bible is clear that God forgives us as we forgive others. Think of all the messes we created in our life. Jesus took it all on the Cross and extend forgiveness to those to received him as Lord and Saviour. What did people do to us? Did they overtake you on the road? Did they smoke in a place they are not allowed to smoke? Did they scheme to steal your promotion? Did they sell you a fake watch?
When we gleefully ask and receive forgiveness from God and then refuse to forgive others, we are making God’s grace too small. We despise his forgiveness. We take it for granted. We take it too lightly.
But … they are so evil, how can we forgive them? You forgive them so you do not imprison yourself in the past. It prevents bitterness from taking root in your life.
Have you ever struggled to forgive someone who hurt you deeply? What helped you inch towards forgiveness (or acceptance)?
I invite you to say this prayer.
Father, help us to forgive. Open our hearts to the possibility of forgiveness, not for others, but for ourselves. May we find the grace to release the burden of anger and experience the freedom that comes with letting go. It’s hard, but we want to let go. In the name of Jesus. Amen.
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